What’s the hardest part of growing up?
It's been a really long time since I've thought about growing up or what makes it difficult. At 43, being grown up is just a part of my life. There are a couple of things that come to mind though. I know hardest means just one, but I have a couple so I'm going to share them.
I think the hardest thing about growing up is that it's harder to make friends the older you get. When you are young, friends are everywhere. You interact with people your own age all the time and are put in situations where you meet people with similar interests: sports teams, band, orchestra, church groups, etc. It's easier to just say hi and start talking to someone, either boy or girl. The older you get, the less you spend time with people in social situations. I work with a lot of amazing people, but do we do anything socially outside of work? Not with very many people. Everyone has responsibilities, families, and established friends and routines. If you move somewhere else, it becomes even harder to meet people. Of course, this is the voice of an introvert, which adds another level of difficulty to making new friends.
A close second for me is the loss of time to try new things. When you are young, the whole world is there for you and people encourage you to try new things and find out what you enjoy doing or what you are really good at. So take advantage of that time and don't be afraid to try something that sounds interesting. I hope as your parents that we will do all that we can to encourage you to try things, take chances, and to not be afraid to fail. As you get older, there starts being more pressure on doing what you do well and not branching out as much. As an adult, I find that I am more afraid of failing than I used to be and have to really push myself to try new things that I might not do well. I know not all adults are that way, but I certainly am.
Finally, and this one might actually be the most difficult thing, as you grow up, you start to realize that trusting people and opening up to them opens you up to being hurt. When you are younger, you make friends easily and trust that people are good and worth knowing and befriending. As you grow up, you start getting hurt by people you trust and start to be more cautious about trusting and opening up to people. The innocence of youth is ruined when someone you trust and believe in betrays or hurts you. The more it happens, the more cautious and reserved you can become. It is important, however, to not shut yourself off completely. There are a lot of really good, trustworthy people out there who won't hurt you and will care about you as much as you care about them. I want to be there for you to help you know this and continue to be willing to open up to others even though you might get hurt.
No matter how hard it might be to grow up, you have to do it and I hope that as you are growing up, you know that your parents love you so very much and will always be here for you when you need us. There are so many things I am excited about when it comes to you and one of those things is watching you grow up, seeing how you move through your life, and being support for you through all of those changes.
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